Friday, July 7, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38m)

"You're NOT my mom."

I felt it best to get right to the point.

"Oh sweetie," my not-mom said in response.  "You're just so tired ... and flustered ... and confused.  Once you get to New Orleans and get to meet your father, I *know* you'll get some clarity."

As near as I could tell, "she" hesitated because "she" too could see "herself" in the shattered mirror shards, and "she" knew that "her" reflection was spilling "her" secret.

"Hang in there, honey."

Papa Kalfu had to know that I knew that he was in my head masquerading as my mom in order to confirm my travel plans, because the voice changed first, suddenly dropping an octave or two.

It was unsettling to hear *his* voice coming out of the lips of the apparition of my dead mother that was in front of me.

"And I'll see you soon, because I will hunt you down and I will find you wherever you go.  You won't be able to get away from me until I get what I want from you."

At that moment, I was startled by the simultaneous flushing of not one ... or two ... but *three* public toilets.  Three stall doors creaked open and the bodies of Stanley, Rodney and Albert slowly emerged, shuffling toward me.

It turned out that those were the names by which they were known when they were alive.  But seeing as how they had all died the night I first came face to face with Papa Kalfu, it was now clear to me that he was the one that had stolen the bodies and that he had somehow managed to bring them all back to life with his black magic.

They moved toward us, with their injuries still intact -- Stanley was missing one eye, Rodney a part of an ear and Albert had no tongue.  He also had apparently renamed them.

"Meet my little monkeys -- Miz, Kiki and Iwa.  They now have one mission -- to help me find you.."








Wednesday, July 5, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38l)

"Focused.  Of course.  All day, every day.  You know it."

I smiled back at my dead mom whom I had made materialize in what was now obviously to me one of those bizarre trips my mind took every now and then when I had fallen asleep or otherwise zoned out.

"Did you see anyone else back there?" I asked her, motioning to the area of the stalls.

"No," she answered.  "Just me and you.  Right here.  Right now.  For as long as you need me to be to get you back on track."

I did my best to let her know that I was okay.  Or, okay enough, all things considered.  I mean I *was* standing in a highway rest stop in front of a shattered mirror having conversations with figments of my imagination after all.

"I'm fine.  Just a momentary lapse, that's all."

She looked closely at me, clearly concerned.

"Are you sure?  You're still on your way to New Orleans to try to find your father?'"

Off in the distance -- outside in the parking lot -- I heard Gator start barking.  Then the lights above me flickered, just enough to make me look up at them briefly.

In doing so, I noticed that my mother had stepped close enough to me to be seen in the broken mirror.

Except, despite what I clearly saw in front of me, it wasn't her reflection that was there in the mirror shards.

I knew a Papa Kalfu when I saw one.

"She" wasn't concerned.  "He" was still tracking me.




Monday, July 3, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38k)

"You know, we have to stop hanging out in highway rest stop bathrooms.  People are gonna talk."

Mario was getting too preachy.  I wanted to lighten the mood.

"You idiot.  I'm not here in the bathroom with you ... I'm *here*."  

As additional emphasis, he slapped his hand against MY forehead to punctuate that last word.  Despite the skin to skin contact, there was no sudden spark or transfer of painful memories.  Instead, I watched him turn and walk right through the shattered mirror, disappearing from my sight.

Timed perfectly with his departure, I heard another commode flush.

I couldn't help it.  This latest impromptu trip through my subconscious was tickling my funny bone.

"What is this?  I'm being visited by the three ghosts of bathroom stalls past, present and future?" I muttered to myself.

Straight out of the strangest Dickens' story ever imagined, my dead mother whom I had never met was the next to appear post-flush.

"Hi," I said hesitantly.

"Oh sweetheart," she said in reply.  "You struggling?"

"I don't know.  I just came into here to pee.  And then ..."

I was indeed struggling when it came to trying to find the right words.

"... all ... *this*!"

She smiled sweetly.

"You'll get through it.  But you do need to stay focused.  Some of your biggest trials are still to come ..."






Saturday, July 1, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38j)

I don't know how long I had been standing there staring at my reflection in the shattered mirror of the bathroom in the rest stop on the way out of Florida, but I do know for sure that I stared each version of me down in hopes that one of the "me"s in the mirror would speak back and give me guidance to get me out of the shattered state I was also feeling on the inside.

None of the reflections did anything other than return my gaze with the same damaged, albeit determined, look.

I thought I was alone -- both Mattie and Gator were outside in the car in the parking lot that had been empty when we had pulled in.

From back beyond the urinals, I heard the distinctive flush of the commode.  A door opened up and out walked a familiar face.

"What's your problem, kid?  Do you think you're the only one who didn't get a happy ending?"

Mario was all tensed muscles and deliberate motion as he approached me.

"I'm on the run ... just like you ... except only I've got a sister who is trying not to die while we up and relocate."

I couldn't believe that we had both ended up at the exact same rest stop at the exact same time as we fled Papa Kalfu.  For that matter, I couldn't believe that he hadn't reacted to the sound of the mirror when it shattered into pieces when I had touched it.

I stayed silent while he continued his lecturing.

"You know -- the best laid plans and all that shit.  They went astray.  We went astray.  But that's not the end of the story."

I was hearing his version of a motivational speech, and it was working, for the most part, considering the source.

"We go on.  We survive.  It's what we do -- it's what YOU do.  Stop wallowing ... and start surviving."


Thursday, June 8, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38i)

I could have died in that bathroom of the rest stop along the highway on the way out of Florida.

All it would have taken was for that mirror to have exploded once my *actual* fingertips touched the *reflection* of my fingertips.  The power of the energy that fueled my gift could have sent shards of glass in my direction and I could have been impaled or seriously sliced.  I could have collapsed and bled out before Mattie, or Gator for that matter, would have gotten suspicious about the length of time it was taking me to use the facilities.

Instead, the mirror shattered ... but stayed in place.

I quickly dropped my hand and took a step backwards.

I didn't leave though -- not right away.

I was drawn in by the image staring back at me -- through the shattered looking glass, as it were.  In what I was seeing, I no longer had a mouth, and so I had lost the ability to communicate except through my eyes.  I felt like they were trying to send me a warning, but I couldn't quite comprehend the message.

Then I started to understand.

In them, I saw all of my pain ... and then I saw how it was reinforced with the pain of the others that I had absorbed.

I knew then that my thought that maybe I could have "reset myself" in that mirror was farthest from a possibility.

They were lonely eyes staring back at me -- damaged eyes.  Eyes that were uncertain exactly how much more they could take.

The mirror wasn't shattered.

I was.


Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38h)

All things considered, it was probably good that I was the only one in the highway rest stop.

I stared at myself in the mirror, not breaking eye contact, as the fingertips on the right hand I was holding up got closer and closer to the touching the surface.

I could take away the pain of others with just a touch.  I held my breath in anticipation in hopes that I could trick my "gift" into taking away my own pain.  Well, my own pain and the pain of all the others that I was still carrying around with me.

Maybe mirror image contact could serve as my way to reset myself ... to wipe my disk clean so I'd be fresh to start again.

Since discovering my power, I had set about testing it one way or the other.  This was no different.

I had learned I had to be making eye contact as well as the tactile contact for the exchange to happen.

I had learned I had to have been exposed to the tale of at least some of the heartache and woe immediately before touching the person.

I had learned that multiple events back to back in a short period of time would put me in the hospital.

I had learned that the energy that was involved in what I did could be dangerous if the person I touched was also touching someone else.

I had learned that the memories I absorbed could be altered if the person was inebriated or heavily drugged.

And there in the rest stop, with Mattie and Gator waiting for me out in the car, I learned that it was a mistake to try to come into contact with myself in a mirror.


Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38g)

We *were* kind of made for each other -- my puppy Gator and I.  And we *were* each kind of a handful -- in our own adorable ways.

Just like Mattie had yelled at us across the parking lot at the rest stop.

Although, admittedly, I'm not sure if Mattie's exhortation contained the subtext that we were "adorable" in our handful-ness.

Regardless, Gator finished up his business and I needed to conduct my own, so we headed back toward Mattie and the car.

"I gotta piss too.  You got him?"

I passed control of the leash over to Mattie and made my way into the rest stop facility.

Yet again, I was hit with flashbacks as I opened the door to the building.  This time, it was memories of the drive down the coast after I had been kidnapped, and how that particular stop on that particular trip had led to me figuring out that my captors were Mario and the guy I only knew then as "angry texter".

So much had happened in so short a time ... and so much was still unresolved.

"One step at a time," I muttered to myself aloud.  "One.  Step.  At a time."

As I washed my hands, I couldn't help but stare at myself in the mirror.

And I couldn't help but fantasize about being able to hold my hand up to its own reflection in the mirror, in hopes that that type of contact would unleash my special power so that I could take away my own pain just as I could do for others with only a touch.

Stranger things had most certainly happened.

I flexed my fingers and slowly reached out to the hand in the mirror, being certain not to break eye contact with myself.

 

Monday, June 5, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38f)

Gator, at his young puppy age, had been on enough long distance car rides to know that when the vehicle starts to slow down, being able to run around is next on the agenda.

As Mattie pulled off the interstate at the rest stop, it was all I could do to try to keep him in the back seat.

"No, no buddy.  Stay back.  Wait one moment!  Hold on!!  We're almost there!!!"

My attempts proved to be futile, and it wasn't long at all before I had an over-eager crazy-excited puppy on my lap.

I did what anyone would do in that situation.  I covered my crotch with my hands to avoid a stray hit to my privates.  And I prayed that Mattie would hurry up and get to the parking spot already.

He finally did, and it was all I could do to get the leash attached to Gator's collar.  If he had been able to open the door, I'm sure he would have done it ... but I was the one with thumbs and so I had to do it for him.  He took off and I barely kept up with him as he expended all his pent up energy from having spent a few hours in the car so far during our great escape from southern Florida.

I was having flashbacks to the night Laura's daughter gave him to me at the closing dinner of the service trip, and how he had gotten loose and was running excitedly all around the back room of Ruthie's Roadhouse until we finally caught him.

It was true that I had lost some time with Gator during my captivity ... but it was good to be getting back to the basics when it came to our relationship.

I looked over toward the car and saw that Mattie was watching me get tugged around the lot by Gator.

"He's a handful," he yelled in my direction -- followed by another exclamation.

"You guys are MADE for each other!"




Sunday, June 4, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38e)

"Of course.  Of course.  If I feel one bit like I'm too distracted to drive, I will let you know before I kill us all."

I wouldn't have thought that I'd have had to promise that I wouldn't do something as drastic as to cause the deaths of the three of us, but I guess Mattie didn't know me well enough to know that my desire for self-preservation was pretty strong.

My life had prepared me well.  I was too stubborn to give up so easily.  I had faced down too many foes to take that route in this situation.  You could just go ahead and add my name to the list of things that would survive a nuclear holocaust -- me and cockroaches and Cher.

Mattie was giving me a quizzical look -- something he did quite often I was beginning to realize.

"I wish I could hear the things going on in there," he said.  "I can *see* you're off somewhere deep in your thoughts, and my imagination starts kicking in as to what you're thinking."

I couldn't suppress my chuckle.

"Are you really sure you want to know?" I asked.

"Maybe.  Maybe not," he replied.

"I was thinking about the end of the world ... and Cher."

He was speechless -- understandably.

I gently chided him, with a smirk on my face.

"Careful what you ask for ..."


Thursday, June 1, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38d)

"You spend a lot of time up there don't you?"

Startled by Mattie's interruption of my silent reverie, I glanced over at him in the driver's seat and saw he was pointing to my noggin.

I nodded in agreement.

"Why do you ask?" I asked of him.

"I thought we were about to have a conversation," he replied.  "And then you just zoned out and stared out the window.  For the last twenty minutes."

I had lost track of both thought and time -- but luckily I hadn't fallen asleep or slipped into a state of semi-consciousness, as that would have risked a potential appearance by Papa Kalfu.

"We're almost at the rest stop ... that is, IF you still think you can get out of your head and pay attention to the road while I take a nap," he countered.

"Of course.  Sure.  That's the right plan," I assured him.

"And you're not going to drive us off the road or anything, right?"

I shot him a look in hopes that it would serve as a reply.

But apparently it did not do the trick.

"I'm serious," he repeated.  "No off road driving with this car without the permission of *everyone* in the vehicle."



Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38c)

"No pressure or anything.  You don't have to talk if you don't want to."

Mattie was giving me an out ... after having just goading me into coming up with something to talk about for the next 21 miles until we made it to the highway rest stop.

Before I could comment one way or the other, he lobbed a question my way.

"So ... when did you know you were special?"

Special.

It was an interesting word choice on his part.

Did he mean "special" as in "not like all the other kids"?  Because I knew that from a very young age every time I heard a school classmate talk about what her family did on the weekend.

Did he mean "special" as in "not able to be understood"?  Because I knew that as a child with teachers who couldn't quite figure out how to handle me.

Did he mean "special" as in "not capable of comprehending unconditional love"?  Because I knew that as a pawn of the system as soon as I was old enough to comprehend why I was being passed around without any promise of permanency.

Special.

I was always "special".

At least in my mind.

Developing a super power when I did was just another example of how damn "special" I was.


Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38b)

"I don't care.  Radio or not -- doesn't matter to me.  Whatever helps you drive better, you know?"

Mattie countered.  "Yep, I'm good.  For now anyway ... once it gets dark, I might be looking for something to keep me going.  Do you want to nap now so we can trade off?"

I couldn't take it personally that I had to remind him multiple times.  I just had to keep on doing it until he understood my predicament.

"I *can't* sleep.  If I do, Papa Kalfu is going to get in my head and figure out where we're going."

He nodded *his* head.

"Oh right.  'Cause of the blood thing."

I could tell that he was reworking his plan.

"So ... maybe *you* should drive now and *I'll* take a nap?  I really want to make it all the way across the state line before calling it a night."

"Sure, sure," I replied.  "Makes sense to me.  Plus -- we should probably soon get Gator out and about at a rest stop or something."

It was an ask-and-you-shall-receive kind of moment.

The words were barely out of my mouth as we passed a sign by the side of the road letting us know that there was a rest stop just 21 miles away.

We both saw it at the same time.

"There you go!" Mattie said as he pointed to it.  "Do you have a 21 mile long conversation topic to keep us entertained?"





Monday, May 1, 2017

Lorem Ipsum: The Aloysius Angelasia Archives (Chapter 38a)

"If I am *never* on these roads again, it will be too soon."

We had been driving along in silence for what seemed like a long time -- Gator, Mattie and I -- and I was finally ready to break the ice.

Or maybe I was just so bored that I couldn't control my inner thoughts any longer and accidentally spoke out loud.

Regardless, Mattie was polite enough to reply.

"You got something against the highways of Florida?" he asked.

"I have done this too many times in too short a period is all I'm saying."

Mattie kept his eyes on the road, but slightly turned his head my way.

"Didn't you fly down here for the spring break service trip?"

"Yep," I confirmed.  "And I was *supposed* to fly home, but ended up driving back with Joey and Gator."

Mattie gestured toward the back seat, where the puppy was still sound asleep and now snoring.  "So Gator should be fine on *this* trip?"

I nodded my head.  "I'm sure.  He's an old pro like me when it comes to these long drives."

Mattie kept the conversation going.

"And how did those guys get you down to Florida for their ..."  His voice trailed off as he sought the right word.  "Thing," was he could come up with.

I wanted to put that all behind me ... but I guess the whole kidnapping experience would forever be a part of my story.

"With a pillow case over my head ... and headphones over my ears ... for most of it," I said ruefully.

Mattie smiled.

"Well I don't have a pillow case, but I can turn on the radio if that would make you feel more at home."




Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Chapter 37



***

CHAPTER 37

There was something off-putting about starting my next adventure in the middle of the morning, in broad daylight even.

Admittedly, I pretty much associated clandestine activities with the cover of darkness -- and, in my mind's eye, they would have almost exclusively consisted of sneaking and skulking, predominantly in the shadows.

But I wasn't choosing the timing of this escape from all things southern Florida. I now considered all of my loose ends wrapped up and so I was choosing that moment in time to strike out on my own.

It had been such a whirlwind of activity, and I had both met a number of new characters as it all played out AND reunited with a few people from my most recent past.

In the end, though, I wanted to start this next chapter the way I was most comfortable and the way I had lived the majority of my life up until that time -- as a solitary endeavor.

Having dismissed Joey and Rochelle, provided for Gator and written a note to Mattie in hopes he would understand my choices, I gathered my few belongings and walked out into the bright Florida sunshine.

The most important belonging I carefully secured was the envelope of cash that Mario and Mria had left for me and that Mattie had surreptitiously snagged while I was being rescued from the fire in the room in the basement of the bar where I had been kept prisoner.

It was a good bit of cash -- not enough to buy me any back alley plastic surgery that would completely change my look or anything -- but enough to take care of my basic needs in the days ahead when I'd be forced to go off the grid and into my version of hiding.

Although, I thought to myself, if there ever was a place where I could undoubtedly find a back alley plastic surgeon, southern Florida would have been it.


***

Bus, train or aeroplane?

Such was my dilemma.

My goal was to get out of town without anyone recognizing me, and the fact that I was a "person of interest" in the so-called "Evil Monkey Murders" wasn't going to make that easy.

Considering that just about any kind of public transportation would mean that I'd have to go on some kind of official record in order to travel, none of those choices were tops on my list.

For a brief moment, I reconsidered my decision to break free from Mattie and to go it alone. He had all but predicted that kind of trouble and had offered up a solution by telling me that he'd be my road trip buddy so that everything could be in *his* name.

With Papa Kalfu on the loose, though, I knew I couldn't possibly risk involving him further -- hence my decision.

He had probably finished procuring a rental car and was likely on his way back to the empty hotel room.

Speaking of which, I had the cash for a rental car ... but that would be yet another paper trail.

The only way out of the corner I had boxed myself into was clear.

I needed a disguise ..

... or a fake ID ...


... or a really good set of boots made for walking a long long distance.

***

That's when it hit me.

My way out of town unnoticed was going to have be courtesy of my own thumb and a reliance on the kindness of strangers.

As a hitchhiker, I only needed to risk that ONE local person might recognize me from all of the news coverage as opposed to more formal travel, where I'd be surrounding by others or have to go on record with a paper trail that might be used against me by the authorities.

I then proceeded to strategize as to how to find my victim.

Victim.

That's not the word I meant to think.

I didn't want to be *that* kind of hitcher.

But I did want to do my best to plan out the right way to hitch.

Being in southern Florida, I could count on there being tourists about. I just had to differentiate them from the snowbirds who might have out of state plates but no desire to travel far away and to spirit me out of state in the process.

I needed to ensure that I was going to be a passenger on a vehicle that was moving quickly and moving a great distance.

Which of course led me to the only sensible conclusion: I needed to bum a ride from a long distance tractor trailer driver.


"What could possibly go wrong with that?" I thought, as I finally left the resort and oriented myself toward the big highway that cut through town.

***

Just put one foot in front of the other.

Every holiday in my youth, that mantra had been drilled into my head -- whether I was with a family that year or back in the group home, those classic cartoons were a part of my seasonal traditions.

Looking back, I'm not sure if the whole "island-of-misfit-toys" motif was some kind of manipulation of us unwanted kids to try to give us hope that we'd one day find where we belonged, but nonetheless, the scenes and songs from it were ingrained in my noggin.

Just put one foot in front of the other.

I had decided that the way out of town was by hitchhiking a ride with a long distance trucker, and I was slowly making my way to the big interstate that separated the good part of town from the not-quite-good part of town the way that "the tracks" had done decades before.

Both feet stopped right where I stood.

The tracks.

Of course.

*That* would be an even more efficient way for me to disappear myself -- and I wouldn't risk any local spotting me thumbing by the side of the road OR any trucker picking me up and recognizing me from all of the news coverage of the so-called "Evil Monkey Murders".

This town also had a busy railroad that ran through it -- I remembered because it was right next to Papa Kalfu's bar and since a train had blocked him from following me when I made my escape that dreaded night.

Of course, I wasn't about to go back to the scene of that crime to start my new hobo life.

But all the same, I changed directions and headed a little farther north so I could intercept the next train as it slowed down to go through town.

***

For the first time in a very long time, I tried to clear my mind as I walked.

I didn't want to think about my past because I had just lived it and it was just too much.

I didn't want to think about my future because it was basically an unknown.

I didn't even want to think about my present because I couldn't think about my specific situation without considering how my recent past had affected my immediate future.

I just plodded along, being careful to avoid making eye contact with any passers-by, and orienting myself to the north and slightly to the east ... because although I didn't know my way completely around town, I knew that the basic layout was major highway on one side, ocean on the other side and railroad tracks in between.

Block by block, I got closer and closer to reaching my destination. I knew I'd need to be near a big enough intersection and also in a residential area so that the train would be going slow enough for me to hop on ... but also in a neighborhood that was hidden enough from public view that I wouldn't be noticed as I became a hobo.

As I approached the main road, my cover was unexpectedly blown.

"Hey!"

Maybe the guy in the car that I could see in my peripheral vision was yelling at someone else.

"Hey! Alan!!"

"Well that changed *that* theory", I thought to myself. *Clearly* the guy in the car knew who I was.

And that was *clearly* going to be a problem for someone like me who was basically hiding from the law.

***

The car next to me with the guy that was yelling out my name wasn't taking the hint that my refusal to acknowledge what was happening was a sign that he should have just kept on driving.

"How's a person of interest like me in a triple homicide -- even though the victims' bodies disappeared -- supposed to ghost myself via a boxcar on a train like a hobo if I'm being chased down by strangers who obviously aren't strangers ..." I muttered to myself.

I didn't want to look over, as that would have broken the little bit of cover I thought I was upholding ... but seeing as how the driver had just yelled out my name, that little bit of cover was already kind of broken.

There was Mattie ... in a different car ... and he was glaring at me.

"Get in the car!" he demanded.

I shook my head.

"Didn't you get my note?" I asked.

Mattie seemed agitated.

"I don't give two shits about your personal psychosis right now."

I was not expecting that reply. And I was *definitely* not expecting what he said next.

"Joey and Rochelle stopped at a gas station and Gator jumped out. He's missing. We're all trying to find him. Now get in the car and stop wasting any more time!"

***

I was stunned.

So I just stood there.

And *that* was not the response that Mattie had been seeking.

"Look," he said with a sigh. "I'm going to say this the nicest way I know how. Now is not the time for you to wallow in your circumstance. Now is the time time for action. We can work through your issues on our long drive out of town."

Stunned as I was, Mattie was not mincing words -- nor was he planning to honor my wishes about leaving me alone for this next part of my journey.

"Gator is loose on these streets and we need your help to find him."

Sometimes you need a verbal slap in the face to help you adjust your priorities.

This was one of those times and Mattie was delivering one of those verbal slaps.

I climbed in the passenger side and slammed the door shut as he drove us away from the railroad crossing that had *almost* become my ticket out of town.

"So -- what happened again?" I queried.

"Joey and Rochelle stopped for gas on the way over to Laura's house, and they said that Gator just jumped out through the window and took off. They don't know if he was chasing something or what ... but they called me right away to help with the search. We have to find him."

I was trying my best to not be selfish, but one of the first thoughts I had just slipped out.

"If someone catches him and they check his chip, they're going to trace him back to me ... and that's going to open up a lot of questions in light of the murders."

Mattie nodded his head as he responded.

"So let's find him *first*."

***

"What's the plan?"

Mattie was quick to answer me.

"Lucky for us, this town is a grid-city. Joey and Rochelle are systematically handling the northeast quadrant, and you and I will continue here where we are -- in the northwest part of town. The gas station where Gator jumped out of their car was on the main road separating east from west, so we both have just as much of a chance to locate him."

I nodded my head to show I understood.

"Do we stay in the car?"

I hadn't intended to stump him, but it looked like that was exactly what I had done.

"I don't know. With two of us, I guess one could stay in and one could walk the streets, but then there's your little issue ..."

Mattie's voice trailed off.

I said what he didn't.

"Yeah ,,, I kind of screwed things up. I *thought* I was doing the right thing ..."

It was my turn for *my* voice to trail off.

We drove a few blocks in silence, neither one of us wanting to continue that side of the conversation.

Both of us hoping against all odds that we'd just see Gator sitting by the side of the road, waiting for us like it was always part of the plan for this kind of diversion.

Block after block, corner after corner, sidewalk after sidewalk ... we saw nothing.

***

Our futile search was interrupted by the sound of Mattie's cell phone ringing.

He grabbed for it excitedly.

"You find him?" he asked by way of a greeting.

He hadn't bothered to put it on speakerphone, but I quickly figured out that it was the other half of our puppy search party on the other end of the line.

Of course, that also meant I couldn't hear all parts of the conversation, but it wasn't too hard to follow along.

"No, me neither. But I did find numnuts walking toward the railroad tracks."

Again, it was easy to connect the dots.

*I* was the "numnuts" to whom he was referring.

"Yeah, he's with me now searching. We have a few more blocks to cover in our quadrant. Then what do you think? Should we look south?"

They must have vetoed that idea by Mattie's reply.

"I guess -- but then what? Flyers on telephone poles? Checking the pound? Getting something going on social media?"

The more I sat there listening, the guiltier I felt about the whole thing.

I turned away to hide my shame, and saw three kids near the corner come running out into the street, directly into our path.

***

Mattie slammed on the brakes, and his cell phone went flying.

From the screams of the kids, you would have thought that we had hit one -- or more -- of them ... but yet in the excitement of the moment, I didn't recall hearing any thuds -- or worse.

Momentarily forgetting that I was supposed to be a fugitive and off the grid and in hiding, I jumped out of the car and ran to the front of it to ensure that he had actually stopped in time.

And he had ... which was, of course, the best thing to discover.

The kids seemed oblivious to the near catastrophe in which they had almost played leading roles, and they continued to yell and hoot and holler as they ran further into traffic -- on the *other* side of the street.

"What's wrong?" I yelled back at them, to no avail.

"Calm down!" I admonished, as a different approach to restore order to the scene -- except that also failed in its goal.

"What the *hell*!?"

My last exclamation probably wasn't appropriate around the kiddies, but I could take solace in the fact that absolutely zero of them were listening to one iota of what I was saying.

Not able to do anything about their hysteria, I turned to my right to see what had created the traffic nightmare of children fleeing mindlessly into busy streets, and it was none too soon, because if I had waited a moment later, I would have been knocked to the ground myself.

***

If you love something ... give it to your friends to take to a good home where you think it will be safer from a life on the run.

If it jumps out of your friends' car at a gas station and runs away BUT, in the end, it comes back to you ... it's bound to try to knock you over in the middle of the sidewalk after chasing some kids down the street.

The mystery of the screaming children was solved.

Gator bounded up to me and jumped up and down repeatedly, attacking me with puppy kisses as was his style.

I heard Mattie behind me.

"Well I'll be damned."

As for me, I was a little overwhelmed.

I had come to terms with my decision and had convinced myself that I was doing the best thing. And fate was intervening in my plans. The chance that Mattie would find *me* ... and then that together we'd find Gator ... seemed like the universe was trying to tell me something.

Mattie was trying to tell me something as well.

"In the car ... BOTH of you ..."

And that wasn't all he had to say.

As a preamble, the first thing he did was press that button that automatically locked all of the car doors.

***

"You guys listen to me ... and you listen to me good."

Mattie was laying down the law.

"The doors are now locked. And I'm not UNlocking them until WE arrive in New Orleans."

I said nothing.

"That WAS the plan -- and I shouldn't have to remind you that WE decided to do things that way because it made the most sense. *YOU* need to be hidden out of sight. *I* can get us where we need to go. So let me help you."

He gestured toward Gator on the back seat.

"And that little guy clearly spent too much time away from you when you were locked in the basement of the bar. He missed you so much that he came back to find you even after you tried to give him away ... so you're just going to have deal with it."

I hadn't been dressed down in a long time -- but I remembered enough to know that the one on the receiving end was often best off not interrupting. Plus it seemed like Mattie was winding down.

I glanced his direction and saw that he was staring straight ahead with clenched jaw.

He drew in a sharp breath and continued in a calmer slightly more controlled voice.

"You may think you're doing the noble thing by pushing everyone away and taking everything on yourself. But on my mother's grave, I *swear* to you that it is the *most* selfish move you can make ... and I *know* that because that's *exactly* what my mother did."

By then, the volume was reduced to almost a whisper ... but the conviction with which he said every word was turned all the way up to eleven.

"I will not let you make the same mistakes that she did."

***

Had we been driving for miles? Or had we just gone around the block?

I had been so taken aback by Mattie's admonition to me that I had lost track of time. It certainly had seemed like a long time since he had informed me that I should basically sit down and shut up and just enjoy the ride out of town -- as had been the *original* plan before I had tried to give my puppy dog Gator away and to embark on my own solo journey.

That, unexpectedly, had led to the adventure of Gator escaping from Joey and Rochelle's car and, just as unexpectedly, it was that adventure that had climaxed with our reunion on the streets of the southern Florida town we were all trying to put in our collective rearview mirrors.

Deep in my own thoughts as I almost always was, a quick peek out the window confirmed that little time had passed since he had taken me to task for pushing people away and compared me to his late mother, who had done the same when no one appreciated *her* special talents.

It was the ringing of his cellphone that brought us all back to reality and pulled us all back into the moment.

"Yeah", he answered curtly, still in hyper-focused, take-no-prisoners, show-no-weakness mode.

As before, I couldn't hear the other end of the conversation, but I had no difficulty following along.

"I got him. I got *both* of them, actually."

I knew that it was the other half of our search party -- Joey and Rochelle -- that had quickly reconnected after losing the original call when Mattie had slammed on the brakes to avoid the kids in the street who were reacting to Gator approaching them.

"Look, I just want to get the hell out of town. I don't need any of Gator's things. We'll stop at a store once we're on the road and buy stuff new."

His next comment summarized it all perfectly.

"I'm so *over* this place. I want to move on ... and put some distance from all of this nonsense ..."

***

Nonsense.

That's how he referred to everything.

And that "everything" included me.

All things considered, though, I couldn't exactly disagree with his characterization.

"Race you to the state line?"

Joey and/or Rochelle, depending on which ... or both ... of them were on the other end of the call with Mattie must have agreed, because Mattie seemed compelled to qualify.

"Well ... I mean ... not the *same* spot on the state line -- since you're headed up the east coast and we're going west to N'awlins ... but you know what I mean. Let's agree to call each other as soon as either vehicle is OUT of Florida."

Judging from the mood, I knew that it wasn't the right time to tell him that I had other ideas with regards to our eventual destination. I knew that much.

He laughed at whatever the reply was, which made me surmise that he had dialed down his intensity just as quickly as it had first appeared.

My hunch was right.

After he wrapped up the conversation, he turned towards me and smiled.

"So ... are you ready to talk through your issues, now? Or do you still need some *alone* time?"

***

I couldn't deny it ... I was having a little bit of deja vu in that moment.

Gator and I had been on a long road trip out of Florida *before* with someone else in the driver seat.

If it had been that trip and it had been Joey who had just said, "So ... are you ready to talk through your issues, now? Or do you still need some *alone* time?", I would have known that he was picking on me and that Joey was being a smart-ass.

'Cause smart-assery was Joey's default.

Not that there was anything wrong with that.

However, since it was *Mattie* who was in the driver seat this trip, and seeing as how I hadn't yet spent a lot of quality time with him, I wasn't going to jump to that conclusion right off the bat. 

Instead of answering him directly, I started to replay our greatest hits to date in my mind.

He was there as part of the group on the service trip -- the youngest of us all and super-eager to please.

He was there the night of the after-party when I collapsed in the parking lot, happy and smiling and excited to use his fake ID to have a little much-deserved fun before that all went down.

He was there on the other end of the line when I booked a random dog-sitter from the fliers I saw on campus.

He was there to see my emergency text messages on my cell that had been left behind in the apartment with Gator.

He was there to coordinate my rescue and he literally pulled me out of the fire and saved my life.

He was there to protect me from myself when I tried to go it alone.

He was there much more than I had realized ... and, upon reflection, some of those times were pretty "quality" after all.

***

"I'm going to interpret your silence to mean that you're NOT ready yet to talk about it."

Mattie's comment was straightforward enough and didn't come across as a dig at all.

"Which -- hey -- is fine with me. We've got hundreds of miles to go. Just speak up whenever. I'll be here."

Instead of replying, I stayed in my own thoughts, realizing that this was the second time in not even a whole day that I had paused to take stock of Mattie.

I wondered to myself why that was.

Why *did* I have such a problem trusting someone else? It was easy to blame my past -- and to see it as a natural defense mechanism for the kind of life I had lived. It was harder to think about all of the potential opportunities I had missed to connect with people because I first had to analyze their actions and evaluate their intentions and classify their conduct.

Maybe *that* was the lesson I was supposed to learn.

Maybe *he* was the person to whom I was supposed to open up.

Maybe I didn't have to be so alone in all my efforts and he was the one that was going to end up as my sidekick.

In addition to my puppy pal, of course. Despite my recently failed attempt to give Gator back to the family that had given him to me, I knew that he wasn't going anywhere and that nobody could compete with my puppy sidekick.

I glanced at him in the back seat and he was curled up in a ball, happily napping.

Mattie saw me looking that way.

"If you want to let him be your inspiration, feel free to nap away. I got this."

***

My response was immediate.

"No. Nope. I can't. No napping for me ..."

Mattie's next statement proved that he had been listening to our earlier conversations.

"Oh right ... the Kalfu guy."

I nodded my head, happy to be engaging in a conversation that didn't involve him yelling at me for pushing him away.

"So how does his thing work again?" he asked.

"I don't know all the details ... and I'm pretty sure it's voodoo or something ... but he can use my blood to get inside my head. He had had access to a blood stained shirt of mine that he was using but I got that back. The problem is that, during my escape from his bar, he had scratched my face when he slapped me with his ring on --"

Mattie connected the dots.

"And that meant *fresh blood*, eh?" he interjected, before reaching a conclusion that I hadn't yet reached. "And I'm guessing *fresh blood* is equal to easier access or whatever for him, right?"

"Actually, I hadn't thought of it *that* way .. but that makes all kinds of sense," I said.

Now it was my turn to get those synapses a-firing.

"With everything that happened -- PLUS the fact that the last news story we saw said that the bar owner had disappeared -- my biggest fear is that he's following us."

Something struck Mattie as funny, based on the chuckle that escaped his lips.

"Yeah. The *last* place you want to bump into a voodoo powerhouse is in a back alley in New Orleans."

***

I should have told him right then and there that we wouldn't be going to New Orleans for just that reason.

But I didn't.

I wanted to trust him seeing as how he had demonstrated such a commitment to me and my situation.

But I didn't.

I could have explained that it was fully my intent to go along with the plan to get out of Florida, but then that I was going to do whatever I could to completely change our course.

But I didn't.

Instead, I just stared out the window and let the conversation die naturally.

I recommitted to myself that I was not going to doze off so that there would be no way that Papa Kalfu could get in my head and suss out my ultimate travel plans.

I filled my noggin with good thoughts.

I had people on my side.

I had a puppy fast asleep in the back seat.

I has survived an ordeal and would live to fight another day.

Had I known what was ahead on our way to our new destination ... and then what would happen after we arrived there ... I might have used the time to devise a *different* plan other than the *new* plan that only I knew was about to replace the *old* plan.

But I didn't ... so I didn't ... and we drove on in silence, each mile serving to separate us from our past and to propel us into our future.

***

[to be continued ...]

Thursday, February 2, 2017

Chapter 36


***

CHAPTER 36

Seeing as how all of us were now wide awake, what with Gator interrupting the dream attack I had been undergoing from Papa Kalfu in such a way as to rouse Mattie from his slumber, I decided that we may as well get to work on coming up with my departure plan.

At that moment, I made a commitment to myself that -- for sure, by sundown-- I was going to be officially and completely out of Dodge.

And by "Dodge", I meant "southern Florida" -- all of it.

The hotel room I was in now. The bar I was locked in before. The other bar where all the unfortunate things had happened.

Definitely joining me in my haste to depart Dodge would be my puppy dog.

Although we had previously established that Mattie would be be a part of our travels, that particular point was now under review.

Definitely being packed in the car would be the cash that Mario and Mria had left for me in the envelope before the fire.

Up for re-consideration, though, would be the final destination.

Before I fell asleep, it was to have been New Orleans.

Now that Papa Kalfu had apparently pried that out of my brain, I was going to have to consider the ramifications of that knowledge being shared with my enemy.

The resort check-out time was just a few hours away.

There were things to do. Plans to set. Decisions to make.

It was the time for action.


***


"Do you have to go potty?"

I was asking Gator, but Mattie actually was the first to answer.

"Nah ... I'm good. You can use it first."

He looked at me sheepishly.

"Oh wait. You were talking to the puppy, weren't you?"

I smiled, as he continued.

"My bad. Not awake yet. Come to think of it, I *am* gonna go piss."

I interrupted him as he left my cot.

"Do you think I can take him out this early in the morning without risking being seen?"

He wrinkled up his face as he considered my query.

"The sun's not even up yet. I gotta think no one else but us is out and about this early in the morning."

He had a point.

We went our separate ways ... ironically enough, for two of the three of us to do the same task.

He apparently finished first, because by the time that Gator and I made it back in to the hotel room, he had already turned on the TV.

His greeting to us when he returned was a little ominous.

"Hey ... you better watch this. It looks like things are about to get a little crazier."

***

I used to *like* having the news on in the background as I went about my day.

That preference was no longer valid now that my situation was being covered on it.

"Coming up next. SHOCKING developments in the so-called Florida 'Evil Monkey Murders'. There are now MORE unexplained disappearances ... and also the FIRST individuals who were present in the bar just a few hours prior to the HORRIFIC events of that evening are coming forward. We'll be right back with those details at the top of the hour for all but our international viewers, who will ..."

I spoke over top of the anchor's last comments to get clarification from Mattie.

"Hey -- what channel is this?" I asked.

"That's what I meant when I said it was about to get crazier. This is a *national* news channel. Your story is no longer only on the local stations," he replied.

I hated myself for thinking it, but my first reaction was to hope for a missing plane or some other unexpected tragedy to distract them from *my* story.

As luck would have it for anyone flying that day, all airplanes were accounted for.

As a lack of luck would have it for me ... all airplanes were accounted for.

Mattie sensed my concern.

"I know you were planning on going off the grid for a bit -- but the grid you're getting off of just got a little bigger."

Every single part of the universe was screaming at me to leave town, and to do so as quickly as possible.

All I could do was oblige.

***

The three of us sat there in the hotel room, transfixed at what was coming on the news on the television.

Although, to be fair, Gator wasn't really paying attention to the TV, as he was actually more than engaged with grooming himself. And "grooming himself" was the polite way to refer to what he was doing as Mattie and I kept an eye on the returning news.

The anchorwoman was true to her word. She launched right into the top news story of the morning, which was unfortunately the goings-on in MY life.

"Good morning. Let's dive right into one of the STRANGEST stories coming out of Florida, a place no stranger for having STRANGE stories, and the ongoing investigation into a string of crimes at the bars in a tourist town that have left a community UNSETTLED."

I knew that I was *personally* unsettled.

I didn't quite know that the whole community shared my feelings.

"Coming on the heels of the discovery of a HORRIFIC set of murders of bar employees and customers ... and the subsequent DISAPPEARANCE of the three victims' bodies ... we have learned this morning that the bar owner is ALSO potentially among the missing."

This was apparently a startling development for all of America ... but *I* fully expected it based on the fact that Papa Kalfu had come to visit me in my dream. I had no doubt that he was headed to New Orleans, expecting to meet up with me and to continue his quest to get access to my blood -- and to my special skills.

"While we continue to wait for details regarding whether the local investigation is considering that individual to be a FOURTH victim of the so-called 'Evil Monkey Murders', we are pleased to bring you some of the FIRST interviews with those who were at the scene of the crime only hours before the events occurred."

A parade of familiar faces was about to fill my screen.

***

"It's just SO shocking. At this point, I'm just thankful that it didn't happen to me and my boyfriend."

The special interview that the news had been promoting was with the Stevie Nicks wannabe from the bar that night who had approached me to be a part of their swinging lifestyle.

Or at least that's what I *thought* she was trying to do when she flirted with me while Rodney and I were waiting for the bar to close so we could make our move.

As I recalled it, she was all about making *her* moves.

"We had even invited that guy to join us on our bar crawl. NOW I know why he didn't come along."

The woman on the screen drew in a sharp breath.

"If he had, *WE'D* be dead monkeys right now!"

At that moment, I was kind of glad that back then I had to stay and to steal some laundered drug money at closing time instead of going along with them to wherever -- and WHATever -- they had planned for the rest of that evening.

I had likely saved myself from some drama.

Well -- some *other* kind of drama -- seeing as how I *was* the number one person of interest in a set of murders that was now shocking all of America instead of just the local area in south Florida.

The interviewer asked the lady a question.

"Did you notice anything strange about his behavior during the time you saw him at the bar?"

It was another face familiar to me from that night that answered.

***

The *boyfriend* of the Stevie Nicks wannabe was the one who answered the reporter's question.

"He was a weirdo. He barely spoke to anyone else. Just him and the jukebox."

His answer concerned me.

Not just because he was calling me names. I could look past that. Whatever. I didn't even know the guy.

But there was something about what he said that resonated with me. Like I should be concerned. I didn't stop listening to the news per se, but there were parts of my brain that were activated and running in the background as I did so.

The boyfriend continued.

"I mean, who goes to a bar and doesn't even talk to anyone? He could have just stayed home and listened to the youtube if that's all he wanted to do."

The Stevie Nicks wannabe nodded her head in agreement and worked her way into the frame.

"Yeah -- in the end, it was lucky for us that he was so anti-social."

Now it was the boyfriend's turn to nod his head and to chime in.

"It's always the quiet ones."

She clearly agreed.

"Always the quiet ones," she added.

That was when it hit me. The jukebox. It was a major risk point for me.

***

I was so used to dealing with my issues on my own -- as I had my whole life -- that I was actually a little startled by Mattie, who was apparently watching me watch the news.

"You look pensive," he commented.

I resisted the urge to reply that I was just thinking, considering that maybe he had never seen the movie in which that classic exchange was featured.

Instead, I just decided to share what was in my brain.

"I'm a little worried about them."

Mattie did his best to embrace what was going to be his new role and to offer me some comfort.

"Ah ... don't let them get to you. They're just a bunch of yahoos ..."

I explained more.

"It's not *them* so much as what they're saying. We had planned ahead and were very careful to only order bottles of beer that night because we figured they'd be thrown out ... and we didn't want to risk leaving our fingerprints on any glasses that maybe didn't get washed because of the timing of our 'strike'."

Mattie wasn't making the same connection that I had just made.

So I made it for him.

"If they figure out that I spent as much time as I did at the jukebox and dust *that* for prints, I probably touched every button on that damn machine."

***

Mattie challenged me regarding the concern I had just expressed.

"Yeah, but does that even matter? I mean it's not like your fingerprints are on file or anything."

He could immediately tell by my facial expression that he was wrong.

"Sorry. They *are* on file then? So you had a life of crime *before* your current life of crime?"

I was starting to learn that I could always count on Mattie to lighten the mood. I would come to really appreciate that fact -- eventually.

At that moment, though, I was in too serious of a mode to allow his comments to provide me with some kind of relief from my growing amount of stress.

"I grew up in the system. I'm pretty sure that every fact about me is in some computer or in some file somewhere. Well ... everything except these latest developments and my ... um ... current new skill set."

Mattie pointed to the screen.

"Plus there's that."

Again, for everyone to see ... or at least everyone to see that was watching that national news channel so early in the morning on the east coast that day ... *there* was the rendition of me from the sketch artist and a grainy video still of me at the bar.

They were apparently using the same imagery that had been on the local channel, because they also had the second person featured.

"Who's that other guy again?" asked Mattie.

Before I could answer, I heard something that greatly increased that level of stress that I was under.

***

"We have just learned that one of the families of the victims has put up a $5000 reward for information regarding the whereabouts of EITHER of these two persons of interest."

I ignored Mattie's question about the *other* guy in the picture and thought a moment about who it was that was putting up that reward money.

I tried not to judge, but Stanley the bartender was just an immigrant from Haiti ... and my partner-in-crime Rodney had come from the rough streets of the south side of Chicago and had told me the horrific story about the day his mother died from stray gunfire that had actually originated from him in that heist gone bad ... so that only left Albert, one of the original kidnapper triumvirate.

I knew a lot about Mario and Mria, the other two from that group ... but Albert -- the original angry texter from that first Florida trip -- was a bit of an unknown.

And even though I didn't care for the guy ... it seems like *somebody* sure did.

"Hey ... you hear me? You okay?"

Mattie interrupted my thought process.

I sighed, which was kind of its own answer.

"Yep. Just taking it all in. And that other guy -- he was just some kid sitting next to me at the bar. We talked briefly about the song I had played on the jukebox -- but that was it. I didn't know him or anything. He got mad that the bartender called last call early and he threw a bottle, which I guess they have on video. So now he's mixed up in this whole thing ... but he was really just an innocent bystander."

The number for the tip hotline crawled across the bottom of the screen. I knew then that I was just one phone call away from being identified.

***

"I gotta go! Lots to do if we're hitting the road today."

I had a moment of panic.

Mattie's announcement that he was leaving came just a touch too quickly on the heels of the tip hotline and the reward for information on my whereabouts being on the TV screen.

Ever watchful that he was, he immediately picked up on my change of countenance.

"We *are* still hitting the road today, right? The more distance we put between us and this place, the better, no?"

I nodded my head and confirmed with him that there wasn't a change of plans.

"Of course. Out of dodge. That's the definite plan."

I didn't share with him that I had already decided there *would* be a change of plans. Sometimes secrets were necessary.

"Okaaaay," he said, dragging it out to make sure that I knew that he knew that I felt that things were NOT okay.

"I have to quit my temporary job ... and get us a car ... *and* do it all without raising suspicions ... AND all before check-out time."

He clearly had an aha moment.

"Are you going to handle Joey and Rochelle when they show up and fill them in on how you changed your mind about going back to PA with them?"

Again, I nodded my head.

"Yes. For sure. At this rate, I don't know if I'm EVER going back to Pennsylvania."

***

Mattie finished getting ready while I continued formulating my latest plan.

Or ... the *revision* of my latest plan ... as that was indeed the task at hand for me.

"Okay, kiddo. Catch ya later!"

It was easy for him to leave with those cheerful departing words -- he wasn't carrying the weight of his world on his shoulders.

"One down, two more to go," I mumbled to myself, as I scratched Gator behind his ears. "And then what in the world are we going to do?"

After Papa Kalfu's latest incursion into my dream space, I knew that I had to strike out on my own. I couldn't put anyone else at risk.

But striking out on my own was going to be extremely difficult if that meant I was going to be off the grid WITH a puppy.

Gator somehow sensed the struggle I was having.

He stretched out a paw, placed it on my thigh, tilted his head and looked deep into my eyes.

Was he giving me permission to go? Telling me that he understood that the road I was going to be on couldn't possibly include a place for him? Letting me know that he was little enough to carry memories of his short time with me into whatever situation he would next find himself?

Maybe I wanted to put those thoughts in his head.

Maybe he was actually so ecstatic over having been reunited, that the paw-to-person contact was his way of saying "let's not ever be apart again".

Fighting back tears, I placed my head next to his.

"A life on the road is no life for a dog," I whispered to him. "No life at all."

***

My puppy pity party was interrupted as the ones I had just thought of as "two more to go" showed up to the hotel room.

"You up?" yelled Joey as he entered, with Rochelle following behind. "You ready to do this thing all over again?"

Gator, always committed to his role of greeter, ran over to the both of them and jumped up to demand their attention.

"Hey buddy. Are *you* ready for another long car ride?" asked Joey of him.

"Good morning," I said, somewhat solemnly.

Rochelle picked up on my tone.

"Everything okay here?" she questioned.

"Kind of. There's been a *slight* change of plans ... and that means I have a new request of the two of you."

Joey stared at me blankly, waiting for me to continue.

He didn't wait very long.

"Come on, boy. Spit it out. We have a long drive ahead of us, and we need to get on the road. Believe you me, a trip WITH a pregnant girl this time is going to mean ten times the amount of stopping for bathroom breaks."

I took one of my patented deep breaths, and Joey had seen me do that enough times to roll his eyes in advance of what I said next.

"I can't go with you back to PA. It's just not safe for me to return right now."

***

"Well then ... *why* are we even here if you're just flakin' out on us?"

The bad thing was that Joey never really did like change.

The good thing was that Rochelle was a calming influence on him.

"Quiet," she said as she shushed him, and then turned to me. "You said you had something to ask us though?"

"I did. I do. It's a big favor, but I'd really appreciate it." I responded.

"What is it? We're kind of on the clock here. Every second you spend hemmin' and hawin' is a second we chould have spent on the damn highway."

"Babe, please!" admonished Rochelle of Joey for his comment. "You were saying?"

"I may not get back 'home' for a long time. I'm wondering if you can pack up the personal stuff in *my* apartment and put it in storage for me. I don't care about the furniture or anything ... just the little bit of stuff I have in my desk and on my shelves -- a few photos and the like. A few boxes and bins and you'd have it all. I don't have much."

Rochelle looked like she was considering ... and Joey not so much. I decided to sweeten the pot.

"Of course I would pay you for your time. And I'd give you the money to pay for the storage unit for the first year."

Joey shrugged his shoulders and turned to his girlfriend.

"Look, lady, it's your call. You only have so much vacation time and the goal is to get my stuff and get back down here as quickly as possible so we can start our life together."

I interjected before she answered.

"You can keep any leftover cash for your new place. Really, I'll be long gone by the time you get back."

Rochelle's ears perked up.

"Leftover cash? Left over from what exactly?"

***

"When I left Papa Kalfu's bar with the drug money we were sent there to steal, I actually skimmed some off the top ... and I hid it. In case they weren't telling me the truth about giving me a bus ticket and releasing me afterward."

For the first time since hearing that I changed up the plans and wouldn't be accompanying Joey and Rochelle back to PA, I saw Joey smile.

"You dirty birdie. You got the makings of a first class criminal after all, don't you."

"Well, I wouldn't go *that* far!" I countered. "I just thought that after all I had been through, I wanted to make sure that I had a way to get back to my original life."

I winced hearing myself say that out loud.

"And now that there is no way I can *ever* return to that life, it might as well go to a good cause. You guys can have what's left of it after you take care of putting my things in storage."

I looked at Joey for his answer, but he was looking at Rochelle.

"We can make it work. And you know what? Mario still owed me some money for the last few weeks of taking care of his sister, so, in my mind, this cash you took from Papa Kalfu because Mario told you too is kind of Mario's anyway -- so if some of it comes to me --"

"-- to US," interrupted Joey.

"Yes, to US ... then it's just karma," she continued.

"Thank you. I really appreciate it. One less thing for me to worry about ..."

There was an uncomfortable pause, only broken by Joey after a few moments.

"So ... the cash. You said you hid it? Where is it?"

***

"Laura's house."

I admitted to both of them where some of the stolen cash was hidden.

"Laura's house?" asked Joey incredulously.

"Yes -- Laura's house," I confirmed.

He still seemed surprised.

"The house we built?"

I laughed.

"Well, the house I *watched* being built. As I recall, I was mostly on trash duty during the project. But yes ... Laura's house. It was kind of the only place I could find when I was running away from Papa Kalfu's bar that night."

He still didn't believe me for some reason.

"So wait a minute. She was in on this whole thing too?"

"Oh no," I replied. "I buried it in the mulch bed on the side of the house. I did it in the dark in the middle of the night and skedaddled right after."

Joey looked at me ... then at Gator .. then back at me.

"Funny. Based on the timing of when you were there, so was Gator. We had dropped him off with her when we got to town and were trying to figure things out."

It all come flooding back to me. Of *course* he was there that night. When I was sneaking around in the shadows, I had heard a dog inside the house trying really hard to get out.

That must have been Gator and he must have sensed that I was close by.

Finding that out also gave me an idea for what to do next.

***

"And one last thing."

Joey flashed me a look of mock disapproval. Or at least I *hoped* that it was just mock and wasn't *real* disapproval.

"You're piling on here, buddy."

I started to speak but my voice caught in my throat. I couldn't fight back the tears coming to my eyes.

"I ... I ... I need you to take Gator with you to her house and ask her to keep him ..."

Gator heard his name, and popped up his head, gazing at me soulfully.

"I can't force him to go on the road with me. It just wouldn't be right."

I turned away to try to hide my face. Gator picked up on it, though, and came over to my side, nuzzling his snout against my hand. He wanted affection ... or else he wanted to offer me comfort.

Through watery eyes, I bent down and gave him a hug.

Our life together had been interrupted one too many times.

I couldn't put him through that again ... but yet that's exactly what I had to do.

"I'm going to miss you little guy. But you're going to a good place with great people. You'll forget all about me soon enough ... but I will never forget you."

I knelt there, not ready to let go. Not willing to let go. Not able to let go.

***

I probably could have predicted it, but Rochelle was the one who was in tune with her empathy.

Maybe it was because she was preggers ... maybe it because she was a career nurse ... maybe it was because anyone would appear extremely empathetic next to Joey.

"Are you sure you want us to take him?" she asked quietly.

I wiped the tears from my face and finally separated from my puppy.

"Yes. I'm sure Laura and Britney will take good care of him until I'm out of the woods with all this."

I wanted to add "AND I'm also sure I'll one day be out of the woods with all this", but I didn't necessarily believe it enough to get those words out.

"Okay buddy. Ready to go for a ride? Ready to go for a ride? Ready to go for a ride?"

I knew if I said it three times in a row really fast, he would definitely be excited and ready and distracted from the reality of our separation.

He started running in circles ... to the door ... back to me ... to the door ... smiling in that way that pit bulls do.

I knew that things would be a little better because I would have that smile as the way I would remember him.

I ceremoniously passed the leash to Rochelle and she got it attached to his collar.

"He'll be in good hands," she offered to me as comfort, as she took him out the door.

Joey came over to me and stretched out *his* hand, with a big smile on his face that seemed a bit out of place.

"Can I get a freebie for the road?"

***

"You know that's not the way it works, right?"

Joey kept on smiling, despite my comment.

"I know *exactly* how this works, remember? I'm pretty sure I'm like your number one target for your tricks. Or are you taking away the painful memories of someone else when I'm not around?"

"Very funny," I responded, before getting a little wistful. "You and I do go back a long way in a short time, don't we?"

Joey wasn't exactly the sentimental type.

"Yeah. Whatever. A little less sap and a little more shaking of my hand please."

I did as he asked, because I pretty much always did as he asked, and because I *was* the sentimental type.

I shook his hand and looked directly into his eyes, and the all too familiar sensations began.

In our past interactions, I had gotten a glimpse into the struggles Joey had with his parents, and even further back into the horrible accident with his high school girlfriend.

This time, though, there was nothing on the surface for me to absorb.

My special skill was that I could take away the pain of others with just a touch.

But Joey didn't seem to have any pain.

His grin got bigger.

"Life is good right now. I got a girl ... I got a kid on the way ... I got a plan ... I got a future ... and I got to save my friend. I'm fresh out of troubles for you, son."

With that, he broke our grip, gave me a wink, and left the room to join his wife ... with my puppy ... in her car.

"See you whenever," was all he said.

***

Alone at last.

Mattie was off running his errands -- quitting his temporary job and arranging for a rental car.

Joey and Rochelle were on their way to Laura's house to dig up the dirty cash I had buried there -- dirty now in ALL senses of the word -- before getting on the road to go back to central PA to pack up my things for storage, and Joey's things for moving in with Rochelle upon their eventual return to Florida.

And Gator. My Gator.

Well, he *was* my Gator, up until that moment.

Alas, he was no longer mine as he was en route to being returned to his place of birth -- to Laura's house.

I looked around the hotel room and paused to steel my reserve.

I knew what had to be done.

I had known it since the latest dream invasion that Gator had somehow cut short.

I could not put anyone at risk -- man, woman or dog.

They all had succeeded in saving me, and for that I would be forever grateful, but I couldn't expose them to the evil that I had met in Papa Kalfu.

This was *my* fight. *My* battle. *My* risk to take.

I looked for the little hotel branded notepad and a hotel branded pen.

When Mattie returned to an empty room, I knew that I at least owed him an explanation.

***

With hotel pad located and hotel pen in hand, I composed a note to Mattie.

Mattie:

There's been a change of plans.

Gator's going back to Laura's house.

Joey and Rochelle are going back to Pennsylvania.

You are free to go wherever you want.

Although I appreciate your offer to join me on the road, I have decided that I can't risk any harm coming to you because of what I've done or the people I now know.

Thank you for what you've done and sorry for the last minute notice.

One day we will look back on this and laugh.

Until then ...

Take care of yourself.

Alan

I put the note on the dresser by the mirror and placed the remote on top of it to keep it in place.

And then I headed out on my now *solitary* journey to escape south Florida and to go even deeper off the grid -- by my damn self.

***

[to be continued ...]